People would hate me if I acted like you!

Kids say and do some funny, crazy sh*t. But it’s only funny because they are kids right? Because if I were to do as my daughter does (she’s almost 3), I’m pretty sure I’d find my self in trouble or very alone. I mean would you even talk to me let alone be my friend if I did these things?:

  1. Running around the house in front of your partner and thier friends with my knickers down. And I’m not drunk. I just think it’s totally appropriate to leave the toilet half way through my business and join in with the bants.
  2. Announcing that “my bum hurts!” to guests in my house before walking very stiffly to the toilet and holding my bum.
  3. Asking random strangers if they want to lick my lollipop. Literally holding it to their lips and saying “want to lick it?” eww that’s creepy.
  4. Putting my hand on my nan’s breasts in public and saying “I like your boobies”. (that is even weird for a child to do, I’m pretty sure she’s never witnessed this being done.)
  5. Shouting out “i’ve got dirty knickers!”. My daughter likes to say this… I don’t know why. She doesn’t even have dirty knickers when she says it. Maybe it’s her way of trying to kill me with embarrassment.
  6. Giving you my bogeys to hold. (hey… at least I don’t eat them.)
  7. Walking right in front of you. Stopping every few seconds to trip you up. Squeezing passed and climbing over you through doorways. Forever. Surely after a couple of years of telling me to walk NEXT TO YOU and to WAIT, you’d just want to give me a kick or something? *
  8. Spitting out the meal you just made for me, down my own chest because I don’t approve of the texture. And obviously expecting YOU to wipe it up and provide an alternative meal.

I mean I’d hate me if I acted like that! But when she does it… it’s OK. Actually some of it can be bloody hilarious, I have to hide sometimes so I can laugh without encouraging her.

But some of it can be excrucitaingly embarassing. I’m never embarrassed of her though, I get embarrased because I’m put on the spot in public to deal with this stuff. And while I do correct her behaviour, sometimes it seems pointless because SHE KNOWS. I think she actually does the above on purpose because she knows she’ll get more attention if she’s being a vile little troll**.

*With regard to number 7, I would never kick my child.

** Troll. Too harsh? I’m certain I’d be called worse if I acted like my daughter. Perhaps I should blow my snot onto your new top and see what you have to say then?

You can only get away with it if you are THIS little and cute!

I’d love to hear what things your children say and do that YOU as an adult could never get away with.


Cuddle Fairy
You Baby Me Mummy
One Messy Mama

26 thoughts on “People would hate me if I acted like you!

  1. Oh my!! I so giggled my way through this! My 3YO, is forever rubbing her face in my chest telling me how soft and cuddly my breasts are!! Erm embarrassing!! haha! and no, I probably wouldn’t hang out with anyone that acted like my children.. Eeek. What does that say? #globalblogging

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hahaha this is so true. Socially rheybgey away with because they’re kids but when written or like that you realise just how crazy their behaviour can be. Like you say, funny though! Thanks for sharing with us at #familyfun x

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Brilliant, they do come out with some strange things doesn’t they? My 7yr old is obsessed with all things poo related and finds it hilarious!
    I love her gorgeous jumper by the way x

    Liked by 1 person

  4. ha ha ha, love that last little face! So moody! My son does the spitting out his food thing. Two identical spoonfuls get given to him but one is pushed out like I tried to kill him! I hide a few raisens in his porridge in the morning (for fun honest) he eats some but every now and then he spits one out and hands it to me to put in my bowl. thankfully not in my mouth but I bet he wishes I would! Thanks for linking up to #familyfun!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Haha I loved this – she looks so sweet and innocent too! I think I would find it quite funny if I went to someone’s house and they blurted out that their bum hurts. Maybe not some of the others though lol
    Thanks for linking up to #BloggerClubUK

    Liked by 1 person

  6. LOL I had such a laugh reading your points. It’s funny how it all boils down to bums with kids isn’t it?! Imagine an adult doing any one of those things & they’d be shunned from the family for good. lol Kids really are lucky they are so stinkin’ cute aren’t they?! Thank you for sharing your post with us at #BloggerClubUK xx

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Haha this made me laugh! I love the lack of social limits they have sometimes. I’ll say to my daughter “Are you going to say Hello to Grandad?” She will look at him in the eye and say “No”. Awkward. x #TwinklyTuesday

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha I love how honest they are though. They will straight up say they don’t like someone. At my aunts house she goes “I don’t want a drink your cups dirty” I could have died 😂


  8. So the other day I’m walking along with my boy and a guy is outside a shop in a wheelchair and has one leg, well I never knew Kemal could talk so loud but he asks in the loudest possible voice ‘why has that man got one leg’. (Please floor open up and swallow me now) I know his curious but like you say would i get away with that? NO! Anyway The guy in the wheelchair starts laughing his head off as I put my head down and walk past and apologise. 🙈 Kids are just curious I totally understand but it never gets any easier being put on the spot and totally embarrassed hahaha. I mean I can laugh about it now but at the time I definately couldn’t!
    Love your blog can really relate to some of them

    Liked by 1 person

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