Gone but never, ever forgotten.

I wrote this and then realised that some people might not know what I’m talking about –  My close friend Karolina passed away suddenly this week, leaving behind her wonderful husband and three gorgeous children. Safina 5, Toby 3 and Lily who is 4 months old today.

There is so much that I want to say. But I don’t think any words can describe how I feel, how we all feel. You made a wonderful impression on everyone who was lucky enough to meet you.

My darling friend Karolina, you lit up my life. Every moment with you was special, happy, positive and flippin’ hilarious. Even through some very difficult times in your life you still smiled that dazzling, contagious smile.

At work, when everyone else would complain about stupid things like… having to work. You would just embrace every task, every person and make every situation the best it could be. Friendly, warm and welcoming – I wish I could be more like you.

When you came to work with me in the cash office, is when we really bonded. Playing Kanye West and Beyoncé to your bump in an attempt to find out the gender, and teaching me a new polish word everyday. The funniest time was when your bump was so big that you couldn’t see that your dress was actually above your stockings!

At home, you made me feel like family. My children were your children and yours were mine. They still are. We bathed them together, fed them together. If my little girl needed changing, you wouldn’t tell me, you would just change her yourself.

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You were an INSPIRATIONAL mother. So selfless. You lived for your children. And I can honestly say I’ve never met anyone who idolised their children like you did. I can’t think of anybody who put as much effort into creating the most beautiful memories and experiences with their children. Not even my own mother! Not even me.

You taught me so much about being a parent. Having two young children is tricky but I get through it because of the things you taught me. And you weren’t afraid to give me the odd stern word if I needed it. (Dare I complain about co-sleeping again!)

Just a few nights ago my daughter woke up crying. I was knackered, I really just wanted to tell her to be quiet and close the door. But I thought “what would Karolina do?” And of course I ended up hanging off the edge of her bed cuddling her until she fell asleep.

I have countless wonderful memories with you and your beautiful little family. And I promise you that there will be more. We will still go for half birthday picnics in the sun. We will still take pictures by the flowers. And I will do whatever I can to make your babies happy because that’s all you ever wanted for them.

I love you Karolina. Thank you for being my friend. And although I’m devastated that you were taken away so suddenly; I am so grateful to have had you in my life. I’ll try not to cry anymore and try instead to smile as you always did. May your beautiful soul rest in peace.          xxx

If you would like to offer your support to Karolina’s husband and children, please make a donation HERE

Mummy Times Two